There is much to like in the Aussie character. We tell it like it is. We are generally up-front and direct. We are easy going and adaptable. We have a certain resilience. We are tolerant and accepting. We are independent and self-sufficient. We pull together during times of crisis. Anything less than that could be described as ‘unAustralian’!
Yet our strengths can also undermine us. We tend to see what’s wrong more than what’s right; we see more reasons something won’t work than it will; we are not surprised by failure and suspicious of success; we are quicker to criticise than we are to praise. Hence, the environment we create for ourselves often becomes one which limits our hopes and expectations, and we become reluctant to step out for fear of getting things wrong.
Being an encourager, then, is a little alien to the Aussie psyche. We might think it patronising or mere flattery or being sycophantic. We suspect the motive behind it. Yet an atmosphere of encouragement is ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL if people are to flourish.
I am especially thinking of encouragement in our following of Christ. Most of us don’t need too much encouragement when it comes simply following our own ways or being self-centred or half-hearted in what we do – that is the easy path. It comes to me without even trying! But encouragement to follow Jesus and give our best in service to Him is a daily essential, whether we are 2 or 22, 8 or 88.
Being an encourager is something we learn. We learn as we become more aware of what we say and how we say it, avoiding putting others down, or ourselves down.
I came across theses ‘why and how’ of paying others a compliment, a part of the encouragement process!
Why? The author gives these reasons:
1. Compliments encourage others who are struggling.
2. Compliments help children learn new tasks.
3. Compliments strengthen (and soften) relationships.
4. Compliments charm others and increase our circle of influence.
5. Compliments help you be less cynical.
How?
1. Start paying attention.
2. Compliment the small stuff.
3. Be specific.
4. Be sincere.
5. Avoid the backhanded compliment.
6. Explain how the person’s great qualities affect you.
7. Vocalize your thoughts.
8. Compliment someone in front of others.
9. Relay “second-hand compliments.”
10. Don’t delay.
My prayer for St Luke’s this year is that we become a community of encouragement as we become the people God desires us to be.